Friday, January 2, 2015


I recently did a Facebook post to my closest friends saying that I was completely lost in this failing 2014 thing.  I lost hope.
If there is something I have always clung to... it is hope.
It is something I always remind my struggling friends of.  It is something I always remind my children of.  It is something that I lost complete track of.
Without hope, everything is dark.  Darkness breeds scary things.  It allows loneliness and depression to creep in and take over.
It is completely consuming.
I am not allowing it to rob me of joys in my life.
I am not allowing it to keep me from being thankful for the great things I have.

My family isn't quitting.

I am not quitting.

There really is hope.

I needed to be reminded of that.  I needed to be scolded a bit and prayed for a lot.  I remembered that it is what keeps me going.

I was looking for hope in all the wrong places.  Working towards impossible goals won't bring hope.

I am so thankful I have amazing people in my life to remind me of how truly blessed I am.  In my hopeless state, I didn't even see a point in living.  I feel like my eyes have been opened and I can see more clearly.  Everything in life isn't going to be pretty or easy.  It may be hard every day for the rest of my life.  What has to change is my perspective.

Here is what I have to live for.   Here is who I hope for....

Where does my hope come from???

My hope comes from the Lord.

He is the one who held my head above water, while I have felt about to drown this last year.   He is the one who placed stubborn and encouraging friends in my life who refuse to give up on me.  He is the one who extends me the grace I don't deserve, and reminds me to do the same with my family.  He is the one I am turning to, focusing on, now.  My hope comes from the Lord, and I hope one day soon my life brings Him glory.

It is happening. 


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